When I became pregnant with my second child, my husband and I were very excited because we were told that I would never be able to conceive again. I had endometriosis which caused me to lose one ovary and caused a growth and scarring on the only ovary I had left. It took eight long years before I would become pregnant again and it was a complete miracle.
An ultrasound was performed immediately and everything looked perfect. A couple of months later, I began to have pain in my abdomen. I went to the doctors where another ultrasound was performed only to find out there was no heartbeat detected. The baby had no signs of life. The doctor was a Christian and he told us to go home, wait one week and pray, and then come back to the office where he would perform another ultrasound.
I can not begin to describe the different emotions running through my head. I felt hurt, anger, hopelessness, and fear. I often would ask God why He was doing this to me. Why did He wait eight long years to give me another child only to take my baby away? Why were other people who seemed unfit to parent having babies, but not me? My emotions became a whirlwind and if I wasn’t careful, they were going to affect my relationship with the Lord. As I lay on the floor crying, I heard God ask me this question: “If I take our baby, would you still love me?” I felt as if I was just punched in the gut. I knew at that very moment I had to surrender my will and my dreams to God.
A week passed and I went back to the doctor’s office. Upon receiving another ultrasound, the heartbeat was beating loud and strong and the baby was alive and well. When I look back on this miracle, I am reminded of the verse in Luke 8:52:
“Do not weep; she is not dead, but sleeping.”
This verse is from the story about Jairus going to Jesus to tell Him that his daughter was sick. By the time they got back to the house, Jairus’ daughter was dead. Jesus cleared the room and spoke life back into the child.
How many of you have felt like your dreams have died? I know I have. But I believe that God is telling us today that the dreams are not dead, they are only sleeping. Don’t give up hope.
Joseph is a good biblical example of someone who had a dream that seemed to be dead. If you remember, Joseph had a dream about his brothers bowing down to him. Genesis 37:6 says:
“So he said to them, “Please hear this dream which I have dreamed: There we were, binding sheaves in the field. Then behold, my sheaf arose and also stood upright; and indeed your sheaves stood all around and bowed down to my sheaf.”
We know from the story that Joseph’s brothers became very jealous and sold him into slavery. It took many years before Joseph’s dream would manifest. He was a slave, imprisoned, and falsely accused. In the natural realm things could not have looked any worse for Joseph. But in the spiritual realm, things were going exactly as planned. Joseph had to come to a point of complete brokenness and surrender to God. God knew what He had in store for Joseph. And Joseph needed to be ready for it.
Like Joseph, I had to surrender my dream of having a child to God. I had to come to a point of complete brokenness. As I died to myself, Christ was risen up. I believe many times God will test us in this area to see what means more to us. Are we more concerned about making our dreams come true, or are we surrendering them back to God? Sometimes our dreams have to die so that God can resurrect them and receive the glory. If your dream is God-Given, it will come to pass.
2 Timothy 1:6 says: “Therefore I remind you to stir up the gift of God which is in you.”
I believe it is time for us to begin stirring up our dreams again. Begin to pray and ask God if your dream is from Him and if it is, ask Him to show you what your next steps should be. Delay is not denial. Joseph had to wait years before the manifestation of his dream came to pass. He could have given up and told himself that it just wasn’t worth it, but he kept pressing on because he knew in his heart that God had given him a dream.
Don’t give up on yourself. Your dream is not dead; it is only sleeping.