A Bluejay I photographed using my Nikon camera

Do you ever wonder why people have to suffer so much here on earth? Many times it may feel like there is no purpose in the suffering. You are praying for deliverance, or even a ray of sunshine, but you wonder why God has gone silent, or if He is even listening at all. 1 Peter 5:10 says:

“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.”

This verse is exactly what God did for me during a time in my life when I didn’t understand what was happening. Two years after my first child was born, we decided we wanted to grow our family and have another baby. Days of trying turned into months, which turned into years and still no baby. As you could imagine, I became very distraught and upset because everyone around me was getting pregnant and having babies. Why couldn’t I? Was I a bad mom or did I do something wrong and my closed womb was a punishment? My mind became the battleground.

One morning I rolled over in bed and had the worst pain ever in my lower abdomen. I began to tremble under the weight of the pain. My husband took me to the emergency room where a growth was found on my left ovary. Not knowing if it was cancerous or not, the doctors performed surgery to remove the tumor. The time between my diagnosis and the actual surgery was about three months. During this time, God gave me a verse to hold on to:

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” Isaiah 43:2 NIV

To make a long story short, the surgery was performed and it was found that I had a severe case of endometriosis. Hence, the reason why I was having such a hard time getting pregnant again. Since they had to remove my left ovary, and the right ovary was damaged from the endometriosis, my chances of ever getting pregnant again were very slim.

Eight years passed and we became pastors at a church in Southern Ohio. I got a new doctor who just happened to be a christian and he was willing to help me try to get pregnant. Well, he actually was going to do more surgery and then give me a small window of a few months to get pregnant. Well, God answered my prayer and I got pregnant…..without more surgery! Everything was going great. An ultrasound was performed to ensure that the pregnancy was not a tubal. We heard the heartbeat and saw him moving. A few months later, something went wrong. I felt pain. I went back to the doctor’s office where another ultrasound was performed only to find that my miracle had died. The doctor told me that he is going to give it a week before performing a D&C so we could pray and seek God’s guidance.

A week later, I felt life and movement enter my womb again! My miracle was not dead…..it was only sleeping. The second ultrasound was performed and God raised the baby back to life! I was able to carry him to the time of birth.

I never understood why I had to walk this painful, discouraging road until I met an Amish girl last year at my little thrift store. She went on to tell me that she had lost two babies. They were a couple of months old and died of a genetic defect. I told her my story about Joshua, and she became very excited. She told her family and friends about the miracle God gave to me. They all were showing up at my store to meet me and see the girl who had given their little, depressed loved one joy. It gave her hope to try again for another child. Well, this past weekend, she called me and told me she needed to see me. God had given her a healthy baby boy and she wanted me to meet him. God answered our prayer for her and her family.

As I stood there and held this tiny bundle, I mentioned to my Amish friend that God had given her a beautiful miracle. She agreed and was full of hope. Where discouragement and fear once existed, hope and joy now live.

I was able to minister to her through my hardship of infertility and the death of a baby in my womb. I never knew that God was preparing me to help a little Amish girl 18 years later who needed hope in her life and positive words spoken over her. I got to see first hand how God will take your mess and make a message. God will take your test and make a testimony. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 says:

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.”

Every trial or storm you walk through will help you comfort other people who are suffering similar trials. You have a ministry and are blessed by God. Though you may feel overlooked and forgotten, God is doing a great work in you and you will be a testimony to someone else. Take heart and be encouraged. I pray that you will find joy in today.


  1. What a glorious story! Praise God for Joshua! Praise God for the young Amish woman and HER miracle! Praise God for the way he brought you together, so you could minister to her, specific to her need and with perfect timing! Thank you for sharing, Lori!

    Liked by 1 person

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